Hi! We’re in my kitchen! Get comfortable. We’re in my kitchen
because this is where I make food, one of my favourite things in life. But in the past, I’ve had sort of
a complicated relationship with food. When I was 17,
I went on a diet, it said no cheese, no bread,
no ice cream! Basically all my favourite unhealthy things
were off limits. I did it because I wanted to loose weight
in time for summer though I worked out a lot
and my body does great working out. It was really
my relationship with food and everything going on
up here that was not good. I weighed myself every day, obsessed over love handles
and thigh gaps, and arm flaps… I remember this one time
when I went to my friends’ house and they wanted to order pizza and I was like:
“Yes!… Nooo!!” And I ate it
and I felt terrible the next couple of days. Dieting in the US is
a big part of how we learn to develop a relationship
with food and with weight. If you’re talking about making
healthier choices in your life replacing butter
with olive oil or avocado, grilling instead of frying, I’m not gonna call that a diet. This is a lifestyle change. When I say dieting, I’m referring to
a temporary restriction in what you eat,
it can be very minimal restriction or it can be very extreme, driven by a toxic mentality. The mentality I had where,
if I loose weight, I could finally
love and accept myself and wear a bikini. But it’s a lie! Loving yourself
as long as you look a certain way isn’t self-love,
it’s self-destruction. Dieting for me was really a solution to the problem of
feeling terrible about myself. And I didn’t know that
there were any alternatives to deal with it. But there are! For instance,
if you’re dieting to be skinnier, maybe just… stop. These types of restrictions on food
can lower your metabolism, they make you feel weak because you’re not getting
all the nutrients that you need, make you more susceptible
to getting sick… 95% of diets just straight don’t work,
people gain all the weight back. The perfect body that
so many people are chasing after is like 20% below
the ideal healthy weight. We’re driven, we’re driving. And the gas in our tank is
feeling that we are not good enough. 1 in 3 female students
in this big survey in the UK said that they would be willing
to shave months or years off of their life to have the perfect body. Willing to die earlier… Like: “Houston…
We have a problem.” But the problem isn’t you. It’s 1, the media,
which is a huge source of our learning about what’s valuable,
what’s beautiful… 2, sexism:
women are socialized to constantly monitor
their own bodies and to make sure that
they don’t take up too much space. 3, our social environment, our friends’ and our parents’
diet and body image issues seep into our brain. And 4, the ginormous scam
that is the diet industry. They actively work to make sure
that, in people’s minds, weight loss is paired
with things like: “And now I can keep up
with my kids, my job, the house…” “More feminine, more sexy,
more energetic, and happier!” Becoming more beautiful,
becoming more desirable, a better girlfriend,
a better person… The diet industry
collectively helps to create a false need and insecurity and then offers you a false cure and makes 60 billion dollars a year
doing it. But here’s the big fucking secret that jeopardizes
their entire existence: you are good enough. You… are… good enough. The people’s goodness,
their value does not come down
to their weight. You are a whole-ass
human being that is so much more
than just a number. And that this drive, this cultural obession
with loosing weight even though we say
it’s for health, is indicative of
a much broader sickness. And what do you do
when you’re sick? You take some medicine. I’m talking about giving yourself
the love that you deserve, I’m talking about
not shit-talking to yourself and comparing yourself
to other people. I’m talking about choices
that are actually healthy. Not letting the world stop
with some pizza. Or bikinis. I’m talking about the end
of meticulous self-monitoring, defining ourselves by our weight. I’m talking about the end of dieting. I’ll see you guys next time. Special thanks for transcript :