Hi everyone welcome, thank you so much
for joining us today okay so we don’t know each other my name is Trish Zamora
I’m the employee wellness specialist here at SCCOE and I’m totally thrilled
to be kicking off our stress less campaign today it started last week but
today is really kind of the official day that we’re getting into the meat of the
program with our first wellness talk and webinar how many of you guys are
participating in the stress less campaign is everybody participating here
okay well you’re not alone there’s about 300 of us that are taking this journey
together so it’s gonna be super fun so I am so excited to have Lisa Richardson
she’s here to kick off the this dress list for us to share some basics about
stress to really kind of help us identify triggers and really give us
some tools on how to cope and even thrive when we’re in stressful
situations and that’s really what this campaign is all about lisa is a master
degree in kinesiology such a registered dietitian she’s the co-founder of the
fitness clinic in Los Gatos and if she looks familiar you might have seen her
on the NBC 11 News where she shares her passion for health and educates our
community so so grateful that you’re here with us today grateful for anthem
EAP whose coordinated us and introduced me to Lisa and I’m gonna let her take
the show from here thank you Thank You Trish well I also want to give
a shout out that I had noticed when I looked through these slides that they
were some of the most on point current I think I usually think I have the most
current information and the slides are just gonna be a little backdrop and then
I found out that your pal here had a hand in developing them so I feel like
I’m already coming into a group that has some advanced knowledge education and I
hope I can add to it whatever we don’t get to today because today is I think
sort of a baseline and I mentioned to Richard that today I’m going to scare
you to death and then we’re going to talk about how to mitigate some of the
things that I scare you about some of those will be in our next series of
lectures because it’s a three parter so believe me we’re gonna get through
everything but today I want to give you a foundation from my most my most
current current current my continuing education that I have to take so you
might think well what is the dietitian who has a master’s degree in exercise
what do they know about stress my current continuing education focuses
almost entirely on this subject because we realize that seven of the top ten
causes of death are stress-related stress causes seven of the top ten
causes of death for men and women you say oh well my doctor was worried about
my blood pressure well let me tell you about that blood pressure if you are
constantly eliciting the stress response and that cortisol and that inflammation
is washing through your body that stiffens your veins and arteries and
they become stiff your heart has to work harder to pump the blood through high
blood pressure part of the big heart disease which is the number one cause of
death for both men and women but it starts with stress we say oh my doctor
talks to me about my cholesterol Wow when you when that that washing
that cortisol that stress response constantly through your body creates
little injury pockets where do you think plaque likes to hang out on that little
injury site it’s like if you have a drain and there’s a little bit of
where does all the hair in the gook coagulate on that injury spot right so
your cholesterol on that plaque buildup is absolutely related to the stress
response. Oh Alzheimer’s that’s just genetic Alzheimer’s dementia mild
cognitive impairment constantly that stress washing through your brain that
cortisol release leads to more Alzheimer’s dementia mild cognitive
impairment so even if I can’t get out you through physical well-being most
people I can get at them if I don’t want you to have your end-of-days be you know
just drooling in a chair and your grandchildren like what’s wrong with
Grandma and Grandpa I don’t want that to be I want I want you to add not just
years to your life because what does that matter if you’re
just like I said drooling doing in a senior home I want life to your years
and so to that end we need to understand how stress works in our lives and here’s
the kicker down that I’ve scared you to death about seven of the top ten causes
of death there’s also a positive reason for stress there are ways that it is
very helpful does it even remember I would say this was in the 40s which
maybe you know but we we just mentioned remember the BF Skinner experiments 40s
and 50s where they wanted to have no stress absolutely they just they called
them the Skinner box they they put with it in actual infants no it couldn’t it
was monkeys because they because here the end end result it would not have
been if it was monkeys and they gave them absolutely no stress they all ended
up dying so we know that when that’s not what we’re after is being completely rid
of stress but we want to be able to use it appropriately and not have it
continually elevate so my favorite example is that if
someone is coming at you with a knife you want your stress response to kick in
right but if every time you walk past your teenagers room and you see the
giant mess and the stress response kicks in then you may be creating that harm
that harm effect because you have to go by that teenagers room a lot as you’re
dropping off their laundry as you’re picking up the plates let’s say Trish
and I both have teenagers yeah yeah you know I have a 26 year old and I have a
16 year old and now I understand why people have them closer together because
my four 16 year old has this menopausal mother who’s like there’s no oxytocin
left in me it’s like you know what honey can you just make some macaroni and
cheese tonight please I just don’t feel like doing anything he is a lovely child
both my children are fantastic but boy you know it’s I’m a different mom than I
was with the 26 year old but I’m less stressed it’s very true about second
children you know ah whatever he’s not gonna die so okay so that’s any just any
little questions before we start because that’s my scare you to death we’re gonna
get on this right we’re not gonna allow this cortisol release this
pro-inflammatory condition to take over our lives and exacerbate any genetic
component we might have towards those seven of the top ten causes of death we
now know lifestyle counts for 70% genetics only 30 you are in total
control of your outcome all right so we’re gonna we’re gonna look at some
triggers so think think about it think about you know share with the neighbor
or write something down tell you one of my triggers I was on vacation and I was
telling my guy I said oh my Valentine’s Day presentation got rescheduled and I
was like huh I come back from vacation I see oh my
god I hadn’t even it was in my book somehow
I hadn’t even seen that I had something on 12 on the 12th so I’ll and you know
I’ll and Thursday all of a sudden boy I can feel the
stress response I haven’t connected with Trish oh my god oh my god oh my god so
some stress some stress so that’s one of my triggers is when I don’t feel I
haven’t looked ahead to my calendar and feel prepared now it was very lucky I’ve
been surprised this might surprise you to know I’ve probably been doing this
exact presentation not with Trisha side at this presentation more than any other
in the past six to twelve months it is probably the one that is most requested
you know people have a lot on their plates
right they have families they have work and then from what I understand about
your work not only are you responsible for the student then you have to answer
to the parent then you have to answer to the government then you have to answer
to whatever internal regulations you have you see what I’m saying you you
have a lot of things you have to be mindful about and careful about that
kind of like like you’re kind of always watching your back so I say that in a
job you don’t have a lot of room to freeform and freelance and so sometimes
that is an stressor in and of itself that you have so many regulations that
you’re you’re bound by so that there that might be a trigger so we’re going
to talk about triggers how do they know your stress this is not this is a little
bit on the slides I’m going to expand upon that I deal a lot doctors send me
people a lot of times with just there for the doctor it’s all about their fat
cells right this person is not you know at the right weight they always use
weight I hate weight but sometimes people come in and I say oh
this is a stress body so a stress body for women usually has a waist at the
bellybutton of over 35 inches for men over 40 inches a stress body tends to
have lower HDL s which are the part of your cholesterol that helps excrete
extra cholesterol it’s a part of your blood lipids that it helps excrete the
extra so you have a low ability to excrete extra there’s some a little the
blood pressure is kind of borderline right the blood sugar oh we’re starting
to get a little borderline blood sugar problems so when I get that cluster of
symptoms and syndromes this is like classic a stress body so usually I end
up talking to people much more about stress I do not micromanage food anymore
it doesn’t work it’s it’s not worked for I don’t know I was born in 1960 so
that’s I think when dieting began I think I was born with a calorie
calculator in my brain that was implanted in the 1960s and it didn’t
work all those years of no fad all the all these things that we did you know
write that as a society we did not get less fat less heart disease and less
diabetes we actually expanded on all three of those frontiers logarithmically
we we’ve met we’ve messed that up completely so I don’t tend to mic manage
people’s food but I try to work with their attitudes around food and what
drives them to food and so and that has to do with stress so how do you know
you’re stressed there are some definite for me there’s some lab levels and some
body cues for you there might be you want a nap all the time or you can’t
sleep it’s kind of like the drug things you know this may cause constipation or
it may cause diarrhea it may cause wakefulness or you may
sleep all the time it may cause weight gain or may weight loss it may increase
your libido you may have no libido so you know for yourself right everybody
responds differently but you know you know I I joked that I’ve had this this
crease in here since I was 2 years old there’s a picture of me and like so a
lot of you know I think I was a stressed-out unhappy little kid always
always frowning so you know if you start getting headaches you know are you are
you are you tense you know are you you know you just know for yourself are you
starting to not find any joy you know in your life they call it an e donia where
you’re not finding joy in life everything tends to be negative and a
downer and if you find the secret to that please come talk to my business
partner because he was born that way and the reason I’m into his life is because
I try to be a little more of the half-full person but you got you know
right that if you’re a half-full person you can never bring the half-empty
person up it only works the reverse so I give you permission this is on the
slides if it’s not on this one it’s on the next series to limit your time with
the half-empty people and it makes it very difficult that is your spouse or
your child or my business partner of oh my gosh how long have we been together
my daughter’s 27 years we have been together as business partners and you
know maybe the yin and the yang of it all works for us but we certainly don’t
we we spend time and physical space but we were not always in communication
which i think is we’re both protecting ourselves and we’ll talk about good
stress bad stress there’s nice slides on some practices and that the actual meet
of these different practices we will be discussing more in our next series and
then there’s obviously there’s some visualizations and relaxation techniques
that can help you in an immediate response if you need
something to immediately distress you questions here so this I like that
second bullet point because social media if it’s used in a comparative way can be
very very stressful and if if you as an adult are not so consumed by it watch
out for your kids because this this can be this can be life-threatening and
since you do work with that population would you want to be very careful about
that social media aspect of their lives if it’s causing problems with you know
suicidal tendencies so you know self other self-harm behaviors so this this
this technology boy it was like what would we do without it but maybe we
don’t always need to know that our neighbor is sailing in the Cayman
Islands on their new yacht you know maybe that’s just not how we need to
know what I understand for grownups the way that social media can be used most
effectively is like hey I’m gonna be in Tulsa Oklahoma does anyone know a good
restaurant there so I do it’s called naked sushi
trust me it’s really good really good I’ve never had better sushi in Oklahoma
unbelievable there’s no ocean there nope normal ocean no no best dessert I ever
had by the way a lemon drop cheesecake best dessert I’ve ever had and I’ve
eaten at Maxim’s in Paris I have I have best dessert Tulsa
Oklahoma so and then that there’s a great many of us that actually admit to
it and if we’re not admitting to it sometimes our body betrays us even if if
you’re not admitting to it and then here’s what here’s what I
alluded to earlier stress can trigger and flare many health conditions risk
for heart attack there’s thinking that stress is a bigger
predictor of a heart attack than is high cholesterol or high blood pressure which
by the way are both related to stress but see this is this is why it’s amazing
that you already had this information that’s usually my big you know big
reveal and this one so seventy five seven out of ten percent of healthcare
costs are so to ciated with chronic illness and stress is the number one
cause of chronic illness no other place has had that so correctly put yeah and
then so then you say well you’re you know you’d like to multitask you’re
always doing more than one thing but what we found out is that usually we’re
just doing more things less well than if we could focus and yes yes that’s
exactly right so that’s called there’s a name for that
it’s called you stress versus distress and so that’s where you used your stress
and so then when I came home and I realized I had this lecture that I had
completely spaced and I and I I just emailed my guy said you know I’ve got
the whole weekend it’s what I’ve been doing this a lot recently and then so
what do you do when you have a deadline you know if you’re me you procrastinate
you procrastinate even more but I now I’d learn to turn into it so here’s the
stress and me not avoiding it and this is you know this is something I develop
but there’s actually a word for it’s like you turn into the stress and
realize that me bustling around cleaning my house washing my dishes unpacking my
clothes writing down all my passwords on an
index card you know neatly sand getting rid of all
those all that little churning and scurrying around as an as a
procrastination helps me settle in my brain the things I’m going to talk about
so that rather than getting mad at myself for not just sitting and staring
at the slides and the presentation I realized that I’m gonna use this little
stress moment it’s like okay well my house will be cleaner my clothes will be
folded you know the cat box will be cleaned out and my pass codes will now
be neatly there won’t be on a thousand pieces of little paper so we can use it
like one of the things is a deadline we talked about that’s a good form of
stress because if if I wasn’t outwardly scheduled I’d be watching TV 20 24/7
tend to be a very slothful family oh and I’m I’m good with sloths you know we
there’s a reason for the sloth people in the world right we’re the Watchers and
then we send out all the hummingbird people to do all the work say oh there’s
danger hummingbird people go get them sloth people will just sit and wait
right so there’s a reason why people have different tendencies
I like being externally scheduled it motivates me it gives me that stress to
get myself ready and productive you email me let’s let’s go how about a
first date tonight oh you know if you don’t have that kind of kind of thing
then then you know we probably would never pair bond right so you want to
have a little bit of that stress you know you actually wash your hair and
comb it kind of thing you use deodorant all those things every day I tell my son
please brush your teeth and use deodorant please brush your teeth and
use deodorant well now there’s an Elizabeth in his life I have I don’t
have to say anything anymore he’s brushing his teeth in using deodorant
you know so it’s kind of like that little that little positive stress in
your life so but it’s when it’s when you can’t shut it off when it becomes
constantly washing through your body and you go from the little pitter-patter of
I’m going to be able to Elizabeth today so I’m gonna use the
brush my teeth to you know the oh my god does she think my jeans are too tight oh
my god it you know in a little little learn that that self talk that brain
talk that will not settle down and then that just keeps the cortisol release
washing and washing and washing through your body and that’s when it becomes
injurious that’s when it can affect your health but that little bit of need to go
that’s next time isn’t just planning the calendar for next it’s in March, March 19
at the same time same time not the same lecture so same time but it’ll be it
will expand on the lecture so thank you so what we don’t want is that kind of
distress to be the new normal and I have a client who is a psychiatrist who is
making a specialty out of teenagers who especially in this area we find that
they are over scheduled over-emphasised over over over achieving that the they
are so stressed it under sleeping that they go to college and they fall apart
physically or mentally and they get shipped home and so she is making a
specialty practice dealing with that type of situation so you want to be
careful about your children we all want you know what’s best but my goodness
again that that kind of that comparison you know if if your kid isn’t gonna take
AP classes really it’s at the end of the world if they’re you know in Los Gatos
we have had suicides because they got into Princeton and Yale but because they
didn’t get into Harvard there’s a suicide that’s just you know my daughter
would say this is like first world problems and this is
we’re making ourselves crazy we’re stressing out our kids so again an
imagine if part of your stress is micromanaging your child’s life
imagine how much less your stress would be if you and your child had a
discussion about maybe maybe we’re just gonna dial it back a little bit you know
if you decide to go to junior college really in 100 years is that really gonna
matter probably not so think about just think
about that maybe there’s ways that in your home life you can not have the
stressed go go go go go go go doo doo doo doo doo be the new normal so here’s
some here’s some ideas on triggers and again that comparison I think this
especially with teenagers is very I mean that happens normally and naturally at
the teenage years you’re always trying to figure out where you are status right unrealistic expectations oh here’s the
the half-empty sometimes the stress results anxiety or depression because of
that constant cortisol wash we we SAP we drain our neurotransmitters so that
constant cortisol we drain our serotonin which is our happy sleepy chemical we
drain our dopamine which is our wow factor we drain our cetyl choline which
is our energizing factor so again to protect your brain chemistry that
anxiety to me tells me that those that the serotonin has been being sapped
other stresses you know money stressors weight stressors again under stress do
you make your best choices around food and activity partner
spouse do you make your best choices your partner how you respond or how you
communicate children and family money sex and kids right the reasons why top
three reasons why people its relationships tend to fail money sex and
kids work relationships anyone think of anything else triggers I see smiles
someone’s thinking of something being around Trish yeah oh yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah yeah you know that’s interesting because the first time I gave this
lecture I remember it so clearly I walked into a place where I did not know
that one third of the workforce had gotten laid off literally the day before
these people were in absolute terror that they after the lecture they were
gonna go back to a pink slip on their desk it was not a good situation but one
couple was so nice they worked together they shared the fact that it was very
hard to drive together because he was always screaming at traffic and that
stressed her out yeah and and so I so then I said you know this might be a
point of communication where you sit down before a trip and lovingly say you
look in their eyes and say you know when this happens it gets me stressed out is
there a way you know you just try to problem-solve and one of the ways my
mother does it isn’t she says in her mind when someone does something
maniacal or crazy or insane on the road she just says well maybe on their planet
yellow means stop suddenly you know or maybe on their planet you know six
inches is enough and so that that just it just helps her so yes traffic is a
huge one in this area it’s a huge one it’s a huge one I agree because it’s
just something that you can only plan so much for yeah mm-hmm I agree you know
with with us with a 16 year old learning to drive I say Cory what you have to
remember is that sometimes a honking horn is not to you and you have to be
you have to manage your startle response to someone honking the horn because you
think and then all of a sudden you make a worst mistake you overcorrect so again
that that road rage iii’s wish there was a way that we had a little like versus
you know a road rage kind of thing which which doesn’t usually help the situation
so yeah there is a lot more road rage again because people are there they’re
cutting their lives they’re there they don’t have enough time so they cut
things close and they try to do one more thing or they’re trying to multitask you
know gosh darn it that horn interrupted my texting you
know kind of thing so I mean so again sometimes planning your day and there’s
something at the end here about making having a big calendar so that you maybe
you can spread out some of your commitments so that you are not so
impacted your time is not so impacted so that you have a brother or some
breathing room around the things that you’re choosing to do not to mention
sometimes saying no oh gee I need you to make three dozen cupcakes for the school
assembly and oh I forgot mom yeah I was supposed to
tell you this two weeks ago and that’s that’s when you just go to Safeway and
get him on yet so see I would I would challenge that because I’m someone who
loves home cooking and prides myself on not doing things and this is not about
Safeway but I’d love to do something a little different we’re going to Safeway
and getting those cupcakes and by the way you’re paying for them because this
is crazy to tell me so late in the game yeah so just using your voice taking a
deep breath taking the deep breath before you say okay okay honey I’ll stay
up all night and do it taking a deep breath and saying you know can you walk
down to Safeway and bring them home I’ll give you the money if you walk and get
them yeah so thinking of ways to make sure that you are do not get in that
situation yeah cuz that’s even just like that example my heart raced a little
because I you know just do those things I’m already stressed at mice about my
son’s senior board because in Los Gatos is a tradition that when your kid is a
senior the parents do this kind of like a memory board and my daughter’s was so
good and now it’s like oh my god I can’t have his be not as good so since he was
like five years old I’ve had it planned in my mind but I need elves to execute
it see I’m very good I’m very good at like the vision but then the actual you
know this is the slothful man oh it’s a lot of collaging but you know if I if I
have it in my mind that’s a big part of it that’s a big part of it because then
it’s just the flow activity of getting it done yeah your school doesn’t do that and here we’ve talked about it your your
endocrine system responds with the adrenaline the cortisol the body’s ready
for action right heart pounds muscles tighten blood pressure so but again as
you mentioned sometimes this is a good thing if a tiger comes through the
door you’re first off the door yeah yes it sharpens your senses it sharpens your
reflexes that’s that’s why knowing yourself I
used to get so stressed that I was such a procrastinator and then I pivoted into
it and I said you know what this is my process and that my procrastination
allows time for things to settle in my brain so that when the deadline hits it
flows out but you have to know yourself you have to know yourself so and do do
what works for you but I stopped I stopped beating myself up that I tend to
wait too closer to the deadline to do things because the beating yourself up
just doesn’t usually doesn’t lead to anything but a lot of muddled you know
it’s hard to it’s hard for your your frontal brain is not engaged your your
decision-making is not engaged when the stress brain is activated so your your
snake brain if that takes over it’s only like run fight flight or women sometimes
we freeze fight or flight or freeze so if that’s engaged there’s no
decision-making so again if I stop beating myself up stop with all that
that negative talk and that stress response and just let my frontal brain
say you know what this is your process you’re just gonna be vacuuming and
washing dishes and things are gonna settle in your brain it’s going to flow
out when you’re ready flow out more easily so but you have to find what
works for you but if you’re not able to make if you’re not able to bring it back
to the frontal brain and that’s a sign that possibly things are still a little
the cortisol is still reacting and releasing into your into your snake
brain and here’s here’s what we talked about
needed to be productive yeah we cannot live without challenges without stress
we cannot live without it but chronic stress it’s the stress that you can’t
turn off your eyes that kind of thing yeah when we’re reacting emotionally or
negatively to me that that’s our snake brain reacting you know we burst into
tears we run away we shut down we can’t communicate and this this affects our
entire life so as a two time marriage loser boy do I understand this as far as
not being able to find my voice in a in a productive way to communicate so you
know 58 years old I think I’m a little better at it but so again and then it
can spill over to your boss your co-workers not being able to use your
voice get your rational brain get those thoughts heard because you get so
stressed out Trish what do you think about that and you guys whatever you
know kind of thing or yeah come see me at the end of the day like if you’re a
boss don’t do that because all I’m doing is the whole rest of the day I’m like
I’m gonna get fired you what I do that kind of thing so you know you can do you
have time for a quick chat and then just say it
but that whole anticipatory waiting and wondering in that stress same with
husband number one Oh we’ll see that we’ll see thing is like you know dad can
you do it you know can we do it or can’t we the will see is like a
yes Oh be careful about the we’ll see because that’s kind of a
passive-aggressive it’s a stress inducer you just don’t know so questions on this let’s see how many I’ll tell you what
our family does we do this we do this and we do this so we’re good at that
my brother’s pretty good at this but it’s just amazing when you know our
family system you know nature nurture I don’t know but we very much we’re kind
of the sleeping procrastinating avoiding people but you you know you you know
people who use alcohol or I had one client who said you know for finally for
once I didn’t go up to grayton to gamble wasn’t about money she’s got plenty of
money but she knew she was using it to avoid as a stress relief cuz she and her
sister are like this around the care of their mother so again that’s another
round of stressors that a lot of us might have in that Sandwich Generation
children at home aging parents I think I need a nap you know that would be my
family’s way of dealing with it one topic that came up a lot as a goal
for this no no no this is this is one of my very very very favorite I do an
entire lecture on this at the pain and wellness clinics that I work for
so most emotional eating the body has an amazing mechanism to signal hunger and
fullness this is not New York Yankees this is neuropeptide Y says I’m hungry
it’s a signal you’re getting hungry those of you who didn’t bring your
lunches with you might be getting a little and then you eat in response to
this and then the body says it’s gonna gonna bring on some cholecystokinin
which says I’m satisfied just stop so as far as I know there’s one set of humans
that is in tuned to this perfectly does anyone have zero to one year-olds try to
feed them one extra spoonful what do they do you can’t do it you can’t do it
until later in life when gradually they get taught to override their hunger and
fullness signals because we say things like eat all that or you’re not gonna
get you know fill in the blank you’re not going to get dessert
so so what you want to do is continue to be in tune with your hunger fullness
signals and only eat in response to being hungry I keep adding to this list so we eat probably for every other
reason besides hunger right we eat because we’re hurt for angry we’re
lonely retired we’re bored for restless or overwhelmed it distracted
cuz it’s hot out because it’s cold out because I made you my feet your favorite
aren’t you gonna eat it I brought your favorite I call that you know company
eating and then the last one I just added recently it says because it’s
there because it’s there so when you are eating for any other reason other than
hunger, CCK is not released there’s nothing to tell you to stop so this is
huge huge because if you’re eating you know to to avoid feeling there was
there’s nothing to tell you to stop does anyone watch my 600-pound life these
people have so much pain and hurt and there’s almost always an incest or a mo
lest and they they say it over and over again food is my only friend food is my
only comfort they use food for all of this never it’s never about hunger so
again around food if this is what you feel is an issue and trust me you do not
have like everybody thinks oh a person with extra fat cells they have a food
issue not necessarily because we you know that most bulimics are very normal
size most binge eaters and I deal with eating disorders quite a bit but it does
I don’t care about your fat cells I really don’t what I care about is that
you are enjoying your food in response to your hunger you stop when you’re
satisfied and it’s sometimes it’s amazing when you
pay attention I didn’t I didn’t learn this until I was probably 47 you know
it’s got served I probably ate it and then I realized that if I was really
listening you know oh gosh I’m full what sort of half a sandwich so then then
yeah me I get a half a sandwich to have for dinner later I don’t have to cook so
again it’s something about being just mindful and attentive and listening and
when you’re in stress when you’re in that stress mode it makes you a little
deaf it’s hard to hear those hunger fullness signals so just as something to
think about that if you’re not it’s like well I’m never I’m never hungry I have
to eat right yes you do sometimes with people like you that are very I have not
heard their hunger fullness I put you on the clock I put you on a rhythm and
routine until your hormones your insulin and glucagon get a tune to a rhythmic
way of eating one of the quickest ways to induce stress reaction this is what I
see all the time I call it the Christmas tree effect what’d you have for
breakfast coffee what did you have for lunch some coffee and a yogurt then I
got home couldn’t understand why I was starving so if you are coming to work
with this or trying to get through your day like that and and a stressor hits
you have nothing you have no resources available to combat it so one of the
things I begged people to do this is healthier I can’t think of any situation
where this does not improve things I want you to eat food during your waking
working hours I don’t care if you have extra fat cells you still deserve to eat
I have a translator at one of my lectures it was a very fluffy woman lots
of extra fat cells she sat in on my lectures because she was translating
them for years and years and years I hadn’t seen her for a while
she said Lisa because of you I actually started to eat again and she lost 50
pounds she’s still a large woman that doesn’t matter but she actually started
enjoying her food and understood that she deserved to eat even though she’s
always gonna be more of an Oprah type than a Kenyan runner type you know you
have to be respectful of what nature made you I never try to have a person
fit into some height weight arbitrary height weight thing you know we’re gonna
find the place where you feel comfortable and confident with your
eating and you start enjoying your food instead of being stressed by it the last
thing I want is for our food plan that we create together to create more
stresses and a lot of times this is there’s two little words I use and I’m
gonna focus on the women here if I say cottage cheese sometimes like oh I saw
it back there I saw it back there sometimes I can hope because when I was
growing up cottage cheese was a punishment food it is a wonderful food
but if it has a punishment connotation for you we’re not putting it in your
food plan it’s not gonna happen so I don’t I don’t do any like those those
foods that you think you should eat well if you don’t like them we’re not gonna
do it there’s all kinds there’s always options that we can get it what you love
what sustains you and what fuels you appropriately both physically and
mentally skipping meals is one of the worst things you can do for your stress
so I would ask you to fuel yourself appropriately during your day does that
help with emotional eating it’s actually my favorite lecture it’s my favorite
lecture oh and if you want a little guideline
this is from Tripoli and resh they wrote a book called intuitive eating and we
talk about being in the 4 to 6 where 4 is gentle hunger and 6 is satisfied not
stuffed just because you go to the Bellagio buffet and you pay $35 does not
mean you that it’s required to make yourself sick
enjoy the artistic presentation enjoy the fact that I will never make prime
rib for myself I would know how to do that so I’m gonna avail myself of things
that are special and wonderful that I didn’t have to cook but I have no
compulsion just because it’s expensive to take myself out of my comfort zone so
just think about that the birthday cookies the treats have them when you’re
hungry for them take one for later have it with your lunch unless you’re hungry
now then have one or for goodness sake have one or don’t have one don’t guilt
around it it’s a cookie you didn’t burn down an orphanage right so here’s the
here’s some of the things we talked about that calendar asking for help
don’t try to be perfect completion better than perfection and
from our former Surgeon General Vivek Murthy and my continuing education there
are two things to generally lower the stress response in your life sleep and
exercise and I always work on the exercise first because sometimes that
helps you be more physically tired and it will help your sleep so that’s
something to think about but I’m a big fan of the exercising and
the making sure that you have done your sleep homeworks
sometimes it means that grown-up talk with your bed mate to say we NEET we
might need to sleep separately I don’t know where this whole sharing bedrooms
got to be so important because I think having people who are rested sometimes
is more important I mean you can come visit right
that’s what my my great auntie who was an uncle who were born in the Victorian
era they had the most beautiful separate bedrooms with a bathroom in between and
I said well where where does uncle do you sleep why doesn’t he sleep with you
she says well he can come visit she was about 70 when she said that yeah nobody
know if you both sleep well together that’s great
no no I’m believe me but boy more often than not I’m hearing you know what my
husband snores or my wife you know has restless leg and she’s hot flashing and
you know sometimes it’s just okay to protect yourself it is not selfish to do
self-care right what do they say on the airplane parents then assist others so
remember that you are better if you are taking care of yourself you are better
for everyone so here are some of the tools we’re going to be talking about oh
look don’t forget these get enough sleep and the answer is 8 hours if you’re
wondering for the most part it’s 8 hours good luck with that
so these are some of the things the tools the self talk boy if you find your
brain just rattling on and on and on about that there’s a you know stop just
stop what you’re doing open yourself up really wide take a deep breath and
come back to your frontal brain to see if you can then challenge some of that
tough you know is it really true is what my daughter said true do I really have
an ass as big as an elephant you know maybe I can just stop yammering on that
you know you just these cognitive appraisals where we we take something
and we just assume we and then we let we stress on it and stress on it just stop
take that deep breath open open your eyes open your body because then that
that’s a quick dissipation of that stress response and then maybe take a
take a challenge reassess reflect and then choose which way to go it’s like
Casey darling I’m so happy that my rear end can still do jumping and squatting
and running and lunging I’m fine with it so and could you be a little kinder I
know I’m your mother but could you practice some kindness so anyway just
get it back out to your frontal brain mindfulness talked about that in terms
of not not being so multitasking focusing on one thing doing it doing it
better not not not being distracted enjoying what we’re doing at the time
not being so distracted thoughts come in as my mom says she says well I don’t
have time for your act now yeah those negative thoughts staying focused
especially when things are trying to tear you away from your focus from being
mindful and here’s some of the things we’re going to talk about next time more
in-depth studies have shown three deep breaths it’s as simple as that three
deep breaths can lower the stress response sometimes as simple as that
that’s why sometimes what do we tell our toddler take a breath right they’re
having a tantrum use your words we’re trying to get them back into this rain
rather than this brain same with us tapir take a breath
sometimes just you just head to the bathroom
take a breath count to 10 come back you’ll be back in your frontal brain
again positive out pivoting into the stress saying okay today is gonna be a
really tight day we can do this let’s you know being prepared making that list
making a plan you make a plan you get hit with that cupcake request you
immediately make a plan you either make a plan that you’re gonna stay up all
night and you’ll be okay you know we’ve all lived and then that dissipates the
stress cuz you’ve made a plan or you make a plan like we’re gonna leave 20
minutes early and we’re gonna stop at Safeway and we’re gonna get every
cupcake out of every container and take it to school and present it and put it
on a nice platter and present it like we made these so but making a plan is
another way absolutely of dissipating the stress it’s like you didn’t bring
the baseball equipment it’s in your car and you went to work and now how am I
gonna get the baseball equipment you know so then you say okay let’s make a
plan I’m gonna meet you in the parking lot you’re below that you make the plan
you dissipate that stress exercise we talked about that lifting is actually
they’re refining that lifting lifting weights long-term for stress relief I
love cardio believe me I love anything that gets you moving
but the lifting we’re gonna hit be hearing more about that lifting heavy
weights nutrition we talked about that sleep if you’re struggling get your
sleep analyzed if you think you might have apnea restless leg one of my
specialty areas yeah this is 68 hours yeah I’ll go with that 12-hour fast
between dinner and breakfast do not be eating late into the night what’s on
tonight I don’t even know what my Monday shows hour
Oh Olympics of course you do not you didn’t eat your eating your carbo
loading will not help Mikayla Shiffrin right it will not help Nathan please let
him land all those quadruples right so 12-hour fast between dinner and
breakfast again don’t micromanage what people eat more
like when and why you’re probably hearing a lot of that and say rhythmic
routine your body can always handle an occasional oat we’re gonna stay up all
night and bake but in general you want rhythm and routine waking up going to
sleep mealtimes rhythm and routine support system yes some of the things
they talk about with the the populations that live the longest they talk about
their support system being so important for their health Stephen Colbert
ministry of loneliness in Great Britain and the best bits I ever saw that he did
because they did they’ve created a ministry of loneliness to study the
effects of loneliness isolation it impacts your health depression heart
disease is a serb aided by the lack of social connection so his joke was that
if you didn’t quite qualify for the ministry of loneliness
they might refer to you to the Ministry of pudding which was like hysterical to
me as a person that when I get bad news I go to the freezer and find my
daughter’s secret chocolate stash and I’m naughty I don’t even like chocolate
but you know when the IRS told me that I owed them $10,000 that I thought husband
number two had taken care of yeah that woo get a little chocolate craving just
thinking that time management the calendar prioritizing see where if you
have impactful stressful times maybe you can you can offload you know maybe you
can hire out some things for God’s sake he’s almost driving he is going to be
going to the store for me you know there’s gonna be things that
will be helpful he’s learning how to make his own you know his own breakfast
hallelujah laughter absolutely you know that pain and wellness clinic when I was
first hired I thought I was like right on the edge I said well do you guys ever
watch like funny movies here like you know Meet the Fockers and the doctor
he’s like looking at me blink bleep I got nothing but I knew I was right so I
still wish that at the pain and wellness clinic they you know once a week they
got to see something a very funny skit or something because it absolutely it
lowers pain it lowers pain lowers your your pain thresholds or raises your pain
threshold makes pain less intense if you are releasing those brain chemistry
those endorphins that feel-good serotonin by laughter by emotion and
then we’ve also found a lot about this that sometimes for people who are
extremely depressed and having a hard time with stress anxiety depression we
get them to go work at a homeless shelter we get them to build Habitat for
Humanity we some volunteer time that this is extremely effective so you may
be hearing more about that especially in this area we’re gonna go more in depth on each in
those toolbox areas the next couple of lectures and think about maybe here’s
some some websites to help you I would also Robert Sapolsky why zebras don’t
get ulcers they’re probably a book written at least twenty years ago that
was so cutting-edge were just now and his his latest book is called fear but
he researches and researchers and researchers using baboons in in Africa
and he has done so much research but his original book why zebras don’t get
ulcers is still quoted and quoted and quoted in all of my stress continuing
education and he it’s sa pol s KY Robert Sapolsky I walked into that continuing
education and I didn’t understand why people were sitting against the wall ten
hi every place was filled I I couldn’t like because I didn’t know I didn’t know
of him I was very lucky I got to hear him and I got six units of continuing
education for it was awesome and he also has a National Geographic
it’s called killer stress if you ever want to if you can dial it up or look at
it online killer stress and it’s all about his
research shows him in the field it’s just amazing then the other thing is
that you have available to you Employee Assistance Program because some things
are very difficult and hard to sort through and I would beg you to avail
yourself of help should you need it you know they’ve heard it all before you’re
not weird you’re not the first one don’t feel shy or you know your brain health
is important so take it seriously and this is something that
is such a privilege to have this as part of your Employee Assistance Program I
know I know all right so thank you so much and I’ll see you in a month and
everybody’s gonna be like totally Zen right and we’re we’re just gonna we’re
gonna go through our exercises and we’ll just hit traffic with ease you’re
welcome you’re, welcome thank you